Seriously, Are You Serious?

I woke up Saturday morning and felt like I wanted to vomit all over the place, thats how bad my nerves was fuckin' with me. I don't know why I was so nervous this man has me naked and watched me push out his baby so why was I feeling like this was my first time meeting him all together. I don't like walking blind into any situation and that is what I was doing the moment I agreed to have breakfast with him.  I came up with 1000 different accuses on why I shouldn't go but another part of me wanted to see what he had to say.  I fought the urge to call it all off and I got myself together.

Of course I got cute but not to cute just enough so he could see that I was doing fine without him and I took the long way to the restaurant. The whole time I was driving a voice in my head was telling me to turn around and forget about his ass let the court handle it but I love my son far more and I do all of this for him, so this was for him again.  I sat in the parking lot for an extra 15minutes just to clear my mind of all that was running through it and said a silent prayer that this all goes well and then I was off.  When I first saw him I was just wanted to run up on him and smack the shit out of him for all the hurt and pain he caused me and my son but with better judgment I didn't do so but with one false move I would have jabbed his ass ASAP.  He never really acknowledge by presence he just gave me the what's up head movement...stike #1 don't invite me somewhere to "talk" and don't at least say good morning.  Strike #2 came when her told me that my face looked fat did I gain weight! okay so try to hit me below the belt because you mad, cool. He basically wanted me to call the whole thing off because it was taking a toll on his family *Nicki Minaj black stare* he continued to say he was just young and wasn't ready to be a father so he split, which would have been a believable excuse if he wasn't 3 years older than me.  He wanted us to work out visitation days and child support options. I agreed to all that he was saying every other weekend Zahree would he his and one week out of the summer. I couldn't believe I was agreeing to this my mind was saying all of this is a no go but my heart made me agree to it for my son and only my son. I thought all was going well until out the corner of my eye his wife comes walking in.  Now I clearly remember telling him to keep his "wife" away from me. She is the reason I changed my phone # and had to block homegirls email because the lil girl was losing her mind and playing to much for my soul to handle. The old me before I had my son wanted to 2 piece her ass on sight actually in my mind i could see the whole thing playing out. He introduced us but I wasn't interested in that at all, I personally waned nothing to do with her, I really don't much to do with him either but because of Zahree I have no choice but to deal with him at least. Strike #3 came so as she opened her mouth "This is about your son so don't be trying to come between Moe and I" *side eye* I laughed her out and continued to eat my pancakes so I could skip out on the bill on his ass and go home to my baby but like i thought lil young thing couldn't keep her mouth closed " I hope he is respectful of me because I am his step mother" " ya'll need to make some type of arrangement about location of pick up and drop off because I don't want HER to know where we live." The words just wouldn't leave my mouth with all I wanted to say to many things was running through my head at the time. So instead of jumping up and letting my inner hood rat out and curse this little girl  out like i wanted to do oh so bad but the grown up in me voted against it. I got up from the table grabbed my purse and turned and looked at them and said "For one moment if you think i care about him or you shorty you got the game twisted up something terrible. I don't care about where u live who u living with or how many kids you have. all i'm concerned about is my son and what makes him happy but If i think for a moment that you or any other person is treating my son wrong i swear I will be breakin' neck and shit." then I bounced. For the Love of ray-j i wanted to throw my orange juice in her face and spit on him but since this is all for the love of my son I held it together just to keep thing civil and give him what he wants his father.